Topix Underground

Much like my Neanderthal progenitors on the plains of Europe, I possess the archaic survival skills of the hunter-gatherer. With winter approaching and provisions running thin, I have tapped one of my left caches buried in the snow. , figuratively speaking of course. My ace in the hole is the little garage sale coffee grinder I use to grind reefer with. It's bright red and someone with my hand writing wrote "cayanne only" (misspelled) on the side with with a black sharpie. The inside of that thing is always caked with a granular substance that I believe the GenZ hippies call "kief" . It has the same properties as hashish - which I miss dearly. I used to put chunks of hash on the point of a safety pin set on a table and light it on fire, then put and orange juice glass over it so the glass fills with hash smoke. Then I'd slide the glass over to the edge of the table and suck that smoke out and hold it until my lungs burst and put on The Doors. 
Anyhow, that's essentially what I just did and I'm whacked out of my gourd because of having quit. I reset my tolerance. Here's the thing about that. If we were back in Neanderthal times and if the earth were in the aforementioned pristine state and the sky at night was blinding and reflective beyond what we could imagine today,  we'd be under the influence of intoxicants as I'm sure they were. And out of that type of very common event that was sure to happen among those superior beings at night when they were sitting around a fire on a beach getting high like I did ten thousand times up in Traverse City, laughing with friends and throwing beer cans and coins into the fire, there could be a record.  It might be dug up ten thousand years from now. Maybe they'll be some pasty-faced bespectacled goofball in Ann Arbor rapt by the ritual and fleshing in the framework of the religion we practiced and the head dresses our shamman wore when he's looking at the charred beer can.  Maybe it was an offering.

I'm a shamman. I'd be the one to convince them that what we were doing was holy not irresponsible and we'd be drinking mescaline and looking at the sky. That's how I'm going to live my life. I'm a GD humanist...one of the last.